a new year

happy new year, lovelies!!!

i am so sorry i disappeared for so long

but i am back!

(@ 162 lb)

2010 recap

since January 1, 2010 i lost 40 lb

i am proud of myself

i have to remember my accomplishments

2011 resolution

i have a slogan:

111 in 2011

(one-eleven in twenty-eleven)

How?

500 intake daily

500 output daily

if i eat more, i workout more. 

easy.

details, please!

155 by Jan 31

145 by Feb 29th

135 by Mar 29th 

^ my birthday

125 by Apr 30th

then -2lb/month until... 

111 on Dec 31, 2011

i have a pink agenda that i'll bring in my purse so i can write down my daily food and exercise stats. Then I'll transfer the summary to my blog. I WILL keep my food log up to date so i can be accountable for the 500 cal intake. I need to lose the weight.

I went to the boy's for New Years day dinner- his whole family from his dad's side gets together to celebrate. I felt so much better this year- i was wearing size 10 jeans and a medium sweater. And I am much much thinner. Still, not thin enough of course. I am still overweight- but 40 lbs less than I was last January.

  I  was able to do some terrific sleuthing and finally figured out the sizes of the boy's sis and mum! His mom went on a diet this year, so she's now down to a size 4 (and proudly announced it too) and his sister is a size 6 (she put on some weight in first year uni but is also WAY taller than me). I am the same height as his mom so i absolutely must get down to a size 4 (by the end of April), and then try for a size 2.

I am so excited for this New Year. I have one more semester left of school and I will do well- I'm not making it a resolution because I am naturally motivated at school work. I'm saving all my resolution will power for my weight loss. 

What are your target goals for 2011?

I missed you all terribly, and hope everyone is doing okay!

xo,

Kaylie.

Christmas Present to Myself: A New Plan

By the end of this month I'm going to be out of the 160's if I have to starve myself after Christmas Day dinner (which I probably will have to of course).


 Here's my situation for next semester: Monday-Wednesday I'm at university in my apartment, and then Thursday-Sunday I'm staying at my dad's and working at the pool near his place. Why am I crazy and doing a ridiculous commute to work during school during the winter? I'm graduating in May and totally horrified that I'm not going to be able to get a good job right away. This way I'm guaranteed to have a decent paying job through summer and for the rest of the year while I volunteer and beef up my resume so I can apply to jobs in museums.

 My dad has a nice glass scale that measures to the first decimal place so I'll be able to weigh myself accurately when i'm working. It's going to be hard to stay on track when I'm living with my dad (any suggestions?) but I think i'll manage. Starve myself during the day, have about half of the dinner he serves and it should be fine.

I'm also going to be getting my GoodLife gym membership upgraded so I can go to any GoodLife gym- that way I can work out when I'm at my dad's. I'm so lucky he gave me his old car, so I don't need to rely on his schedule to be free to borrow a car.

160s-size 12

         December 31 @ 159

150s-size 10

         January 31 @ 149

140s-size 8

        February 29 @ 139

130s-size 6

        March 31 @ 129

Breakfast- 1/2 grapefruit w/cinnamon & water

Lunch- broth (in a portable thermos) and salad, Diet Coke

Dinner-1/2 of the dinner my dad makes, or my own dinner: veggies in pasta sauce and shrimp.

I'll follow this meal plan and fast on days where I don't need to drive or work at the pool.

Workouts will be training 3x a week, doing kickboxing and cardio as much as I need to to drop the weight.

February and March are going to be tough months but I really want to be a size 6  by April, so it's worth it. And I'm not going to let my homework slide so next semester I won't blow my diet because of stress.


Starving my way to skinny <3
Xo,
K.

missing in action

...i was going to title this post MIA like missing in action, but i realized that would sound like bulimia... which I tried last week after a binge but failed at. Which is a good thing. I don't really want to go there.

Sorry I haven't been posting. I will write a list to explain why:

• Protocol Case Book due Monday for drama (approx 5-6 pages of writing to do)
• 950 word Critical Review on a play due Tuesday
• 18 PAGE essay due Wednesday, and the prof is taking of 7% for each spelling/ grammatical error... 7 PERCENT!!!
• 20 Minute presentation on Wednesday in my Canadian Drama course on the significance and importance of my chosen play.
• Friday I have two major drama presentations... one isa monologue I haven't even memorized yet!

I have barely started my 18 page essay... But tonight I think I'm going to finish ALL of my research notes, then Sunday-Monday-Tuesday write the paper... ugh. That's approx 6 pages a day... which is actually manageable i think. But with all the other work doesn't really seem like it. I'm going to make a different list for myself with a breakdown of work to do so I can focus and get things done.

Food wise, I haven't been restricting. Life wise, I'm a total mess because of my homework. Goal wise, I've blown the Christmas plan. But i still fit into all of my skinny clothes and tried on some old grade 11/12 summer clothing at my dad's house and some of it is too big. So that made me feel better at least.

I'm going to dissapear again, but I will resurface next week and read and comment on everyone's blogs and start posting more Thinspo-- and I will get back on track!!

Xo,
K.

failures & plans

Today was supposed to be a liquid fast.... !#$%^&*(%$... I was doing SO well, and then I had 6 small pieces of California Roll sushi for dinner... ugghhh.... SO I went to the gym and worked out for two hours. If it was an ordinary intake day I would be feeling great, but because it was a liquid day, not so much :( Sorry lovelies!

In other news, I've decided to set some goals for myself! I am going to boy's parent's place between December 20-23 (boy doesn't have his exam schedule yet, so we're still not sure). I want to look as skinny as possible for that because I always feel like the biggest fatty ever when I'm around his mom and tinyyy sister. His mom's probably a size four and his sister's a size 2 (on her way to a size 0). I look like a giant freaking whale-a-saurus around them, and I feel like they are judging me every single second. I hate hate hate eating when I'm over there too-- but of course, I have to. I just take small portions. They don't really notice because boy's sister doesn't eat much either.

Nov 5 - Dec 20th Plan

Daily Caloric Intake = 600
Liquid Fasting = 2/wk (M-Th)
Training = 3/wk, 1 hr ea. (T-W-Th)
Cardio = 4/wk, 500 cal ea. (M-T-W-Th, at least)

Weekly Targets:
Nov 11 - 166
Nov 18 - 163
Nov 25 - 160
Dec 02 - 157
Dec 09 - 154
Dec 16 - 151

My personal trainer weighs me in at the end of each month, so i can't loose too much weight... frustrating! Otherwise I'd be trying for WAY more... but we'll see what happens. If the weight just keeps falling off (and I'm not losing muscle mass) I won't do anything to stop it. What do you girls think? If I loose 9 lbs in a month, will she think that's suspicious? I mean, I clearly HAVE the fat to lose so it shouldn't be too bad, right??

This weekend I'm visiting the city...

...so I'm not going to be able to post :( I'm sorry girlies! I'm seeing a play Friday night and then visiting my bestfriend (B) Fri-Sat and then seeing boy Sat-Sun. I'm going to try my hardest to eat as little as possible, aaack. Boy knows I'm trying to lose weight, so I'll just have lots of salads. I'm going to convince B to go rockclimbing with me on Saturday. If she's feeling lazy, I guess we could just go to the mall- and walk around lots and lots. I hope I don't gain!! Do you lovelies have any suggestions for weekends away that I could use? Wish me luck!!

Because I'm curious... what are your favourite thinspirations and motivations right now?

My main thinspiration right now is Taylor Swift, because she's all over the media and radio and so I'm always being reminded of how successful and beautiful skinny girls are. My biggest motivation is to be at or as close to my goal weight as possible by the end of April when I graduate Uni. aaah!

Thanks for the comments and follows <3


Sarah - oh yeah, that VB pic is for sure photoshopped! Oh, and your other reasons for skipping the Germany trip are totally valid- missing friends, school AND new years would be so so tough. Whatever decision you make it'll be the right one <3 Oh also I posted my stats in the 'about me' section on the right side of my blog!


Hilima - thanks for the follow xo, and I love Natalie Portman too! She's so beautiful and petite. Kind of like Audrey Hepburn.


Sarah- I'm trying so hard to be as healthy as I can but it's tough.

A.beautiful.mess- thanks for the follow, hun <3 love your blog-- good luck with limiting your intake below 1000 cals.

Xo,
Kaylie <3